DearGod ---I know Im not the Christian I was once was and I know Ive questioned your decisions in my life,......is this the end of my marriage,.....is this suppose to be better for me somehow to feel like I cant breathe most days,..........to watch my sons anger escalate daily to the point he hates his father,...to watch my daughters senior year in heartache,....is something good to come out of all of this.........DEAR GOD ITS KILLING ME---IM LEAVING IT IN YOUR HANDS AND WALKING THE EDGE,.........IS THAT THE PLAN??? PLEASE SOME SIGN,.....SOMETHING TO KNOW THAT SOMETHING GOOD OR BETTER IS GOING TO COME OUT OF THIS,...........I LOVE HIM AND MISS HIM SO MUCH--HES MY SOULMATE,..ITS LIKE IM MISSING HALF OF EVERYTHING,..........PLEASE!!!