I am dead tired of changing myself alone. I know and believe that God/Jesus Christ is working on it. But, I despise myself. I still do the things I shouldn't be doing. I am stuck in my past's habit, though I have grown physically, mentally, and spiritually. But this lust for something is the only thing that burns my soul. I've tried everything. The longest time that I had stopped since I was 13 is a 10 days. Recently, I cried to God to stop myself from bringing my old self 'til the end. But, the question remains... "When will I change?" This is the only problem left. Everything about me has changed.

I pray that someone with a clean soul can pray for me to drive this out completely. This is exhausting. I am so "me". Yet, I or we supposed to be not ourselves. We should be selfless, for God wants that for us.

May the Lord help us all. Thank you and thank You.