I have been in a long distance relationship on and off for the past 6 years. We re-connected earlier this year and were really trying to make things work this time. This past Tuesday night, he went to bed but never woke up. He was only 57. My heart is so broken right now. I am so mad at God. I don't know how to handle all this grief. Since we were long distance, I live in Illinois, he lived in Oregon, I cannot say goodbye, I cannot go to his funeral.