I am currently about 10 days clean from using meth. I quit 2 times before on my own for many years and i was always ashamed when I went back to depending on it for me to have energy. I think I was born tired and depressed. I know my mom was extremely depressed when she found out she was pregnant with me (her 3rd and last child.) I always felt pressure to be the perfect child and I was her sounding board. Guilt worked really well on me to keep me in line. I have felt guilty my entire life and never fully understood why. I loved my mom so much and wanted to please her in any way I could but it seems I always fell short of my goal. I never felt good enough. I felt ugly. I felt stupid. I was no good period. My mom looked like a movie star to me. She was beautiful and everyone loved her. She was warm and laughed a lot and was a great story teller. I'm feeling tired right now and not able to finish what I started out to write. Please say a prayer for me to get past my feelings of lethargy as quickly as possible and be able to feel some energy on my own. I like feeling productive. :) I have asked God and my angels for help. Any additional prayers will be appreciated. Thank you all and many blessings to you.