Sorry you are having difficulties right now, but glad you are in prayer. One thing I learned in church and still practice today, is when the tribes of Judah asked God who should we send, and God answered send Judah first. Judah means praise. So I praise God first - as the creator of heaven and earth, for His goodness and mercy which endures forever, because He is I Am. I start my prayers with praise. So remember, "send Judah first. "