I am going through a similar situation. Yesterday I was reminded by a younger cousin of how blessed I am and how beautiful I am. I'm consciously trying to have positive thoughts and love myself just the way I am. God lives and it's His will that we be in good mental health as well as physical. Try to think positive and when the negatives come... thought or feeling forcefully and consciously push them away. Listen worship music and get in the habit of praising and thanking God. Then other habits and parctises will fall into place. God is able and he's in the water with you. Just don't be too busy asking so many questions that you miss His answers. Pray for me as I pray for you