No friend do not end it. Pray pray pray. I was where you are at one time. It all gets overbearing & overwhelming at times. These are difficult times we are in right now. PRAY. Breathe in fresh air, sit with your bare feet grounded to the earth for 30 mins & just breathe, meditate, look around at the beauty outdoors. Notice the sounds, the sun & clouds, the peacefulness, the chirping of the birds. This is all for US from HIM.You are loved my friend more than you know. Please contact someone, a clergy you trust, a neighbor, a friend, a counselor. Speak out loud about your pain. Get it out verbally & hearing the words for yourself. PRAY. ALWAYS PRAY.Remove the gun(s) from your possession during this time. The power of prayer is real. I will speak with you my friend. I am here. YOU ARE LOVED & NEEDED! PRAY