Please pray that God will help me find a purpose, or that he will just take me away. I can not stand another day of lonely. Have no living relatives, no g. parents. no mom or dad . no aunts or uncles. I have never had children , so there are no grand children. No living spouse. I have no sisters or brothers.( have 7 siblings).. I feel all alone. I have spent many hrs in churchs but always come home alone after the service. I have no friends. You ask what is wrong with me. Well I wonder that myself. I Have a great BIG heart and will help and do anything for anyone, even go out of my way beyond the call of duty. i am nice, and try to live right. I am clean, drerss well, am know as being pretty. But I am very depressed adn I think I am the most lonely person in the world. Depression is overwelmong. Every time i hear of a death, I always wonder why them and not me. cuz they have soo many people that care about them,. I am the oldest of 8 children. all my siblings have homes , money, kids , grand kids, My mom passed 9 yrs ago, and I have never been invited to anything since then. they never visit me, or even phone me.( unless they need me to help with something for one of them) they are in their own little clicks. I could understand if I had ever done anything to shame them, but I have not. I do not drink,, smoke ,etc, I never ask anyone for anything. I work, and seem to get along with strangers very well. I am very depressed, and very lonely. and with out family i feel so alone. Even when i had heart problem and went to the hospital, my siblings did not call, visit or etc. Why? I do not know.... Maybe I think it is because I am so universal and like all nationalties. I am diffrent than them, but is that bad? I am not in a social click. and do not try to be anything I am not. God Help Me, I cry this everyday. I am tired of trying, tired of crying, Just tired of being tired of being depressed adn lonely.
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