i think me and my best friend are cutting ties and i dont think i have the strength or the courage to let go. i really hurt her so bad to the point that she had to leave. and i completely understand that because who wouldn't? it's just that im still clinging on to every bit of hope that one day we'll get to talk things out but it seems impossible because it's been seven months since we last spoke. im losing hope. i dont know if i should continue letting go because what if one of these days she suddenly messages but i completely detach myself from her? but at the same time what if she never messages? my mind is growing tired and everytime i ask God for a sign, it's like He's telling me to let go, but i just don't know how because she's been a big part of my life and i still want her here. i really miss her and i dont want it to end like this. im really tired of being alone

hi im with these people in a council and thing is i feel so left out. it's like they all get a long together but I could never seem to do the same because im quite awkward and i get all so shy and weird. i think that they believe im quite odd. im scared that i wont grow close to any of them because of how awkward i am and i feel as if theyre talking about me behind my back. thing is, they mean a lot to me and i really just want to be close to them and joke around with them like normal human beings. its tiringv

im really tired. i feel as if god is not there. i've been begging for forgiveness from someone that i hurt, but i keep seeing her like posts about giving up on people you love and ive been seeing her posts about cutting off people from her life. she hasnt responded and im scared that she wont. im scared that all my efforts will go to waste, and that all that i did was absolutely for nothing. i genuinely am so sorry, i think god can attest to that, it's just that i dont think she sees that anymore. im just a teenager, and so is she, and thing is, teenagers make a lot of mistakes and i completely recognize them and hold myself accountable for them, but i've done everything i possibly could to salvage everything and it just seems like it's not enough. and that in the end, it was all for ntothing. i don't know what to pray for anymore ; pray for her to come back and sort things out with me? or pray for me to let go of her? i honestly dont know. please give me advice if you have any.

I'm about to send an important voicemail to a person that I have hurt before. I am afraid that she won't ever come back, that she will leave me and never want to become companions ever again. I know that I was toxic and I know that I can change, I just hope that she still sees the same too. Please give me advice and please pray for me for I am so fearful

i am afraid of the future. i've hurt somebody that i love so dearly and i was so toxic. i was so abusive and i never really knew that until the damage has been done. though this sprouted from my own experience of abuse and though i have suffered mental issues, making it hard for me to control my actions or think clearly, i am afraid that she will not forgive me. i've been sending her apologies and explanations but there is no reply, she has just left me on delivered. i doubt that she will reply, but at the same time i'm hoping that she will so that we can sort things out. i keep seeing her like posts on instagram about cutting people off, about the traits of toxic people and walking away from them, and now i'm afraid that she will do exactly just that. she means more than the entire universe to me. i know i'm better and more matured now, especiallly because of the fact that i actually went to therapy, it's just that even if i am, i am scared that she won't give me the opportunity to prove myself once more. i'm still so young and so is she so i know we both have the opportunity to grow and change, it's just that i know the damage feels like its beyond repair and i really am so scared that she won't give it a second shot. i dont want to lose her. please please please pray for me. please pray for her healing. please pray that she will be okay. please pray that we will be okay. please. i am so anxious i love this person so much, i really do.